Distractions and Sex

www.SouthernPleasureParties.comA few weeks ago the kids and I were at Disney World (yep – again) for Mickey’s Not So Scary Halloween Party. This was my second trip without hubby in the parks with me, and first ever without him at least at the hotel with me (he stayed home this trip). Something that I learned from the first trip was to not let distractions distract me while out and about with my kiddos. Disney can be a very busy place and it would be super easy to get separated and have quite the fright. It always tickles me a bit when I see people so deep into their technology at Disney World they fail to really be in Disney World. I want to shake them a little and say, “Take it all in!”

Why am I writing about this in a post titled, “Distractions and Sex?” I’m getting there. After dropping my kiddos off to school this morning, I was driving to the gas station and heard an interesting story on NPR that I very much related to, and thought immediately that some of you might as well. What caught, and then retained, my attention, was an audio blurb from the interview, “I love reading, and I am someone who can actually become so absorbed in a novel that I really think the house could possibly burn down around me and I wouldn’t notice. And I’m simultaneously someone who loses their keys at least three times a day, and I often can’t remember where in the world I parked my car” (NPR, 2012).

I almost smacked the dashboard and exclaimed, “That’s me!!!” But I didn’t – that would have hurt.

It made me think of women in general today – while not everyone is an avid reader, how many of us are able to focus on one thing – reading, writing, crafting, running, etc. to the exclusion of all other events and activities around us? Yet, when it comes to everyday things, we’re a bit scatter brained. The interview went on to explain a study on how people are distracted and what it does to their brains, distractions included Facebook (social media in general), text messaging, and phone applications. It made me think of how often we are multitasking everyday – from several tabs or windows open in our internet browsers, to texting while watching a movie or show, to listening to an audiobook while driving and maybe doing something else like drinking or eating.

Which made me think of sex. Our brains are so overstimulated and distracted throughout the day, that when we are ready for sex – it can be a real struggle to keep our minds on the here and now of the bedroom (or bathroom, or closet, or where ever you’re being intimate). The big problem with that, is that an orgasm for a woman comes largely from mental (and physical of course) stimulation. If we can’t keep our minds focused on what’s happening to us now and how it’s making us feel, we can often be left unsatisfied. Think back to the last time you had some lovin’ (be it solo or with a partner – either is fine) – how many times did you mind drift to the next thing on your to-do list? As women, to increase the pleasure and frequency of orgasms, we need to focus on the task at hand and exclude all other distractions – turn of all your screens, silence ringers, and make sure you have some time for just you. Now, of course, if you’re on a tight schedule, rub on some Pure Satisfaction and it’ll speed the process right up.

Thompson, H. & Vedantam, S. (2012). A Lively Mind: Your Brain on Jane Austen. Retrieved from http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2012/10/09/162401053/a-lively-mind-your-brain-on-jane-austen

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